I am overwhelmed.
I just graduated with honors and a baby.
Major accomplishment.
I want to tell my story.
I want it to affect people who are where I was.
I feel like I lost my best guy friend ever. What hurts most is he doesn’t even seem to care.
I cant believe how many people are hypocrites.
I want to cry so bad..but can’t.
I want to run to him and hug him.
But I cant even speak to him.
I feel like turning around and undoing all that ive done. Even though its what God wants
And its whats best period.
I feel distant and left out of things.
My little girl is growing so fast.
I never listened when people said she would.
I hate that he misses so much
I feel bad for things I cant control.
I want to change things I cant.
I wonder if things will ever be anything close to what they were.
It feels like every dream I had has been crushed.
All because of my actions
I just graduated with honors and a baby.
Major accomplishment.
I want to tell my story.
I want it to affect people who are where I was.
I feel like I lost my best guy friend ever. What hurts most is he doesn’t even seem to care.
I cant believe how many people are hypocrites.
I want to cry so bad..but can’t.
I want to run to him and hug him.
But I cant even speak to him.
I feel like turning around and undoing all that ive done. Even though its what God wants
And its whats best period.
I feel distant and left out of things.
My little girl is growing so fast.
I never listened when people said she would.
I hate that he misses so much
I feel bad for things I cant control.
I want to change things I cant.
I wonder if things will ever be anything close to what they were.
It feels like every dream I had has been crushed.
All because of my actions
I cant believe she has so much control. it hurts. she makes him do such stupid things.
People talk about how they miss the person I was a year ago.
They want me to go back to that.
And I cant.
People assume I should regret the things I did.
I know they were wrong
but with out them I wouldn’t have the one thing that means the world to me.
My life is far from easy.
I complain about it a lot.
But I would not trade it for anything.
People talk about how they miss the person I was a year ago.
They want me to go back to that.
And I cant.
People assume I should regret the things I did.
I know they were wrong
but with out them I wouldn’t have the one thing that means the world to me.
My life is far from easy.
I complain about it a lot.
But I would not trade it for anything.
comments are very welcome. and anyone who wants to talk im very open. i need people to confide it right now.
Sami
9 comments:
sammi you a very wonderful person, do not let others get you down. if you ever need to talk you can call your aunt diane, even though you really do not know me.. i wish that could be different but life sometimes leads family's in different directions. it is hard not to be close to the family as you all know. but remeber i am always only a phone call away. i love you for the woman you have become. your aunt diane....
hey sami. i'm always here ok. if you ever need anything just get in touch ok?! your going through a lot of stuff right now and i just wanted to let you know how proud of you i am. you are so strong and loving for your little girl. and thats major points in my book =]
-amy broderick
hey girlie, i unlike other people, love the young lady you've come to be this year. last year we won't friends, but now we're friends this year, but that's not the point. i have seen many girls that claimed to be my "friend" and got into the situation you did, and they all threw in the towel and acted like nothing every happened. that's what makes me proud about you, no matter what comes your way, you stay there and fight the situation. and i'm proud to be one of the peeps in your life that call you friend. keep going on with your life, God is blessing you through everything, trust me, i'm seeing Him work through you whenever we're at church. :)
aw, girl. I love your heart and I can't begin to believe what you are going through. I am always here to talk. Message me, pull me aside at church, anything, really. The fact that you want to use what you are going through, even though it's so completely rough, to help other girls is unbelievable, and you will reach people because God will honor what you are trying to do for Him.
I may not have the best advice because I've never been where you are, but I am always here for you, and I mean that with all my heart.
Awe, girl. I know that we don't know each other very well, but I'm very sorry about all of this. I'll be praying for you. In fact, I'm praying for you riiight now. If you ever need someone to confide in, I'm a good listener. Your heart is so beautiful, and you are so strong.
hey Sami
I love you so much. you're my princess. you are a wonderful young lady and mom. there will be many tough times in life, but with God, friends and family you will get through them. i'll always be there for you. i'm praying for all of us, we will survive. Desirae is an awesome blessing from God. she is going to grow up to be a wonderful world changer for God. she has a great mom too!
love you always and forever
Dad
i love how open you were. and the first couple lines (after the graduating and baby part of course) i can sort of relate to. i too, chose to let go of a friend because of God's calling. but you know what i hold on to? nothing is forever. relationships, people, time is always changing, and because of this, we can never expect the same thing. so take hope in the future, because it will be very different from today, and God will make each day better than the one before so long as you place your heart with Him and keep him first. i know you do. and i admire you for that.
Sammi,
I know you indirectly and have prayed for you on several occassions. I don't have much to say other than I know of another young girl who has walked your path 6 months ago and God is doing amazing things in her life. That same God will do amazing things IN and through you. Just hang in there. Below are her websites. Maybe she can speak where others of us cannot.
http://parkers1021.blogspot.com/
http://evakatherine.blogspot.com/
Sami,
I would be happy to talk to you! It sounds like you are in the same place I was about a year ago! Thankfully, Jesus Christ is our Savior and in accepting Him, our sins are washed clean! You can email me at cekparker@gmail.com.
-C
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